RIGHT, let me understand this. The Prime Minister is now going to work out a Brexit deal with Jeremy Corbyn and the Labour Party.
She’s going to sit down with Magic Grandpa and work out a means to get Brexit through Parliament.
Rex Features Theresa May is going to sit down with Magic Grandpa to find a means to deliver Brexit
How do you think Magic Grandpa is going to behave?
Do you think he’s suddenly going to come over all statesmanlike and do what’s best for the country?
Or will he think to himself: “I’ve got this bint over a barrel. I can screw out of her whatever the hell I want. And then look like I’m the bloke that saved Brexit.”
Go on, take a wild guess.
Except it won’t BE Brexit. It won’t be anything we voted for back on June 23, 2016.
We voted to leave the EU. Not to leave a small bit of the EU and carry on bunging it vast loads of dosh every year.
And doing as we’re told over trade.
And abiding by their free movement of labour rules.
So we’ll have even more EU workers over here, undercutting the wages of the poorest of our own workers.
That’s kind of the OPPOSITE of what we voted for.
And we won’t even have a vote in the EU, as we do now.
It will be the worst of all worlds.
Getty – Contributor Do you think Magic Grandpa is suddenly going to come over all statesmanlike and do what’s best for the country?
And we’re at this appalling position largely because we have been failed by our Government.
Failed by our Prime Minister. And failed, dreadfully, by the House of Commons.
They all paid lip service to respecting the voice of the people. Hardly any of them meant it.
The majority for Remain in the House of Commons is enormous. And they were determined to get what THEY wanted.
The horrible thing is, even many of those who DID demand a proper Brexit let us down.
They let us down when they failed to mount a bid to lead the party after the referendum.
And they’ve let us down again by not being realistic about what sort of Brexit we can have.
It was clear to me at the end of December that there was no possibility whatsoever of us leaving the EU with No Deal.
It simply wouldn’t get through Parliament.
So the choice was May’s admittedly rotten deal, an even worse deal further down the line, or no Brexit at all.
I do not understand why the European Research Group of MPs didn’t understand this back then — and vote for May’s deal.
BREXIT’S GOT EVEN WORSE
We would be better off leaving with no deal at all, they kept saying. Yes, indeed.
But that was never, ever going to happen. How could they not see this?
There’s a good case for arguing that any deal cooked up by May and Gramps would be worse than staying in the European Union.
It would be, at best, a purely nominal Brexit, which would leave us all worse off — and the EU rather better off.
So at every stage, and by every part of the House of Commons, we have been let down, betrayed.
Whatever happens in the next few weeks, we need a new kind of politics.
One that represents the majority of the British people.
And for this shower to be washed away.
Labour Leader Jeremy Corbyn says No10 talks on Brexit with PM Theresa May were ‘useful but inconclusive’
Time to go for C4 Snow
JON Snow is the white, elderly, public school-educated presenter of Channel 4 News.
He is famous for his unrelenting left-wing bias and wearing ties.
PA:Press Association C4’s Jon Snow, famous for his left-wing bias and ties, shoe-horned his prejudices into the Brexit march report
He attended the Brexit march in Westminster on March 29. And what did he have to say about it?
“It’s been the most extraordinary day. A day which has seen . . . I have never seen so many white people in one place . . . ”
Needless to say, this drew more than 2,000 complaints from viewers.
Some, I hope, will have pointed out that the anti-Brexit march the previous Saturday was even more resolutely white.
Or perhaps simply alerted this pompous ass to the fact that 87 per cent of the country is white.
Snow was channelling the anti-Brexit line that all leavers are white and probably racist scumbags.
It is an idiotic assertion and always was. C4 News has apologised, kind of. One of those apologies that isn’t really an apology.
Anyway, my view is that Jon is male, pale and stale and it’s time for him to go.
Ideally to be replaced by someone who can report a news story without shoe-horning in their prejudices.
The benefit of boredomAPPARENTLY helicopter parenting is to blame for breeding a new generation of over-stressed halfwits who can’t do anything for themselves.Such parents are too clingy, always hovering near their poor offspring.
Filling their entire days with activities outside school. That sort of thing.
So the survey makes a lot of sense to me.
Parents need to give their kids the right amount of independence.
Too much too young and they can end up in gangs, stabbing each other.
Too little and they find themselves unable to make their own decisions.
And kids also need to understand the great benefit of boredom.
Nothing is better for making a child think for him or herself than being bored out of their wits.
Belle’s grout pout
AUSTRALIAN model Belle Lucia was mercilessly trolled on the internet.
She put up a picture of her four-month pregnancy bump. But it was invisible. Look a bit closer, you trolls – Belle’s baby seems to be gestating in her lips.
Instagram Belle Lucia’s baby doesn’t seem to be gestating in her belly – but in her lips
Instagram The model with the ‘pout full of grout’ was trolled mercilessly online
Either that or the lass has had enough implants of grouting in her gob to tile an entire bathroom.
Assange is yours to keep
HA! The Ecuadorians are sick to the back teeth of the albino fruitcake Julian Assange.
The WikiLeaks alleged sex offender has been holed up in their London embassy for almost seven years.
PA:Press Association Leftie Ecuadorian President Lenin Moreno and albino fruitcake Julian Assange deserve each other
He didn’t want to be deported to Sweden to face charges of rape.
The leftie Ecuadorian government agreed to give him shelter, just to p*** off the rest of us.
But Assange has broken the terms of his asylum and become a real pain in the neck, according to Ecuadorian President, Lenin Moreno.
Tough luck. You wanted him, you’ve got him.
Serves you right, Lenin, old bean.Corbyn under fire
I WAS as shocked as anyone by that story about our Army soldiers using an image of Jeremy Corbyn’s head as a shooting target.
I mean, if you look at the photo closely, you can see that half the shots missed.
AP:Associated Press Army soldiers using an image of Jeremy Corbyn’s head as a shooting target
AP:Associated Press I bet nobody would have been bothered if it had been a picture of Nigel Farage
Were they blindfolded or something? Or worse, closet Labour supporters?
There’s been a lot of pompous guff talked about this whole business.
It was just a group of soldiers having a laugh.
I bet nobody would have been bothered if it had been a picture of Nigel Farage.
THERE’S a parliamentary by-election in Newport West today. Can you imagine traipsing down to the polling booth, thinking: “Oooh, I must vote Conservative.
“I think that Theresa May has done a truly bloody marvellous job of delivering us Brexit.”
PA:Press Association ‘I think that Theresa May has done a truly bloody marvellous job of delivering us Brexit’, said no-one, ever
As the SDP’s Brexit spokes-man Patrick O’Flynn put it: “Her tenure at No 10 Downing Street has been characterised by dither, deceit and political cowardice.
“To say she is not up to the job must be the understatement of the millennium to date.”
But by the same token, can you imagine voting for Magic Grandpa’s Labour Party?
They’ve shifted their position so many times they don’t even know what it is any more. All for their own political gain.
Getty – Pool Then again, Magical Grandpa’s Labour keeps shifting its Brexit position for political gain
I hope the Welsh voters tell the two major parties to get stuffed.
If they are Remainers, they should vote for one of the two parties that have been consistently opposed to Brexit – the Lib Dems or Plaid Cymru.
And if they’re for Brexit, for Ian McLean of the SDP.
RIGHT-ON Brighton Council is distributing stickers to local schoolchildren. These carry slogans such as “Trans Ally” and “My pronouns matter”.
If you can think of a more fatuous waste of time and money, please don’t tell Brighton Council.
Brighton and Hove City Council Brighton schoolchildren were given stickers with slogans such as ‘Trans Ally’ and ‘My pronouns matter’
They’ll take it up in a flash.
CommentQUENTIN LETTS Treacherous Theresa May has surrendered our freedom… and her honour CommentLEO MCKINSTRY Why is the BBC spending our £3.8billion licence fee on leftie fake news? CommentTHE SUN SAYS The establishment want a second referendum — let’s do it: No Deal vs PM’s Deal CommentJAMES FORSYTH MPs have 10 days to pass Theresa May’s Brexit deal or calamity strikes CommentSIR GRAHAM BRADY It’s time to settle this Brexit mess and get out of the EU with a deal
PLANNERS in London have given the go-ahead to the enormous “Tulip Tower”.
This is a 1,000ft tall sky-scraper in the City.
Foster + Partners The Tulip Tower is another d**k-shaped tower for the d**k-heads of the City
It will have an observation floor and rotating pods, apparently. I’m not sure what the rotating pods are for. Problem is, it doesn’t look much like a tulip. It looks a lot more like a giant penis.
So it will get the nickname “Porksword Tower” or “The Extremely Large Whanger”.
All very fitting, I suppose, given the number of d**k-heads who work in the City.
Shocking video showing ‘soldiers using picture of Jeremy Corbyn for target practice’ sparks British Army investigation