Pre-wedding counselling help couples identify looming problems and proffer solutions

February 21, 2015 8:45 am

Although rough play help your a great deal, there are other things that are even better:
It is worrying that many prospective couples seeking to live their
wedding dreams spend months preparing for the wedding day, wrapped up in
all its excitements and anxieties, yet they overlook the importance of
pre-wedding counselling and the advantages it brings when the love
cookies start to crumble.

Considering the rising figures of marital separations and divorces,
especially among young men and women, it has become imperative for
prospective couples to attend pre-marital counselling programmes so that
they can strengthen their chances of staying together in marriage.
There is an assumption that counselling is only for relationships
experiencing problems and not for couples in love, but the primary
objective of pre-wedding counselling is to help couples identify looming
problems and proffer solutions wherever possible so as to maintain a
happy and healthy marriage.

Ask questions
In the midst of the fancy wedding details and the distraction from
families and friends, take time out to ask yourselves questions which
can be uncomfortable with either party but sensitive that if left
unanswered may crop up many years later.

Discuss issues such as finances, faith, divorce, personal problems,
goals and aspirations, children; family crisis which has affected
marriages in your family are likely to affect yours if not properly
managed. Identifying and discussing certain issues which may strain your
marriage if not tackled are reasons to attend pre-marital counselling.

Find answers
If you have difficulties talking through the issues of your lives, you
may find it difficult to resolve your conflicts too. Pre-wedding
counselling would enable you to overcome and resolve your issues
amicably when they come up.

Pre-wedding counselling allows you to talk openly about individual
responsibilities as well as roles you jointly share. Also allow your
partner to understand your faith and beliefs.

Parents are your first role models and if bad habits are inherited from
your them, it can affect your marriage. Family influences and dynamics
are the traits many people exhibit in their marriages; identifying your
habits and discussing ways to overcome them can be achieved through
pre-marriage counselling.

Pre-wedding counselling can help you to communicate better, resolve your
problems and spend less time disagreeing on issues and more time
understanding each other.

Who can counsel?
Pre-wedding counselling can be performed by professionals like
psychologists or marriage therapists, religious leaders, counsellors, or
experienced couples who have been married for several years and still
enjoying blissful unions.

A professional marriage or family therapist will be required if the
issues to discuss are complex. These usually consult under private
practices and charge for services rendered.

Religious leaders and counsellors can provide pre- and post-wedding counselling to members of their religious sects.

Couples with years of experience can also serve as mentors to young couples through sharing of experiences.

All these people have different ways and skills to help you identify and
overcome your problems so that you can both enjoy your marriage in
peace and harmony.


  1. Pre-marital counselling can save your marriage from constant disagreements, which can lead to frustration and depression.
  2. A problem shared is a problem solved; therefore, invest and nurture
    good relationships with couples whose marriages you admire and find
    mentors who can be good role models to you.
  3. It is important to equip yourselves with the necessary tools needed
    to strengthen your marriage commitment through pre-wedding counselling
    so that you can both enter the marriage with a clear vision which will
    help you fulfill your purpose in life.
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